The Catch-up Post (Only for the curious)

Since I began with the middle, this is the post, reader, in which I bring you up to speed on my long struggle.

Preface (a little bit of rant on my soapbox… because I can): 

I do not support the Suffering Olympics (aka. competing to see whose infertility story involves the most suffering). Everyone’s journey is their own. Every infertility sucks. Period. I simply share mine here for context and so that readers with questions can reach out. 


  • Context: I’ve been on birth control since puberty for irregular periods and pain. I take medication to manage severe anxiety and occasional bouts of depression.  I’ve had all sorts of chronic pain most of my life. I’ve never been pregnant. Partner and I are both 31.
  • I taper off my anxiety medication and have my IUD removed (Yay! We’re going to have a baby!)
  • We try for six months using ovulation test kits right out of the gate. (I’m really impatient so we were going to get this thing done as efficiently as possible.)
  • Nothing happens, so my gyno throws my first infertility drug into the mix. Clomid + timed intercourse (Yes, this is the point when sex becomes “intercourse,” ugh.)


  • We see an Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE) for the first time.
  • Lots of testing: (Blood tests timed to cycle, Ultrasounds timed to cycle, HSG, Saline Sono, Genetic panels for myself & partner, Sperm analysis for partner)
  • No cause for infertility found (Maybe a partially blocked tube?) “I’m almost certain you’ll have a baby within three months,” says the RE
  • Three IUIs (Clomid + trigger) = Nothing
  • IVF #1: Fresh cycle = 4 embryos, 2 transferred = Nothing
  • IVF # 2: Fresh cycle = 4 embryos, 2 transferred = Nothing


  • Now we’re broke, so lots of waiting (grrrr) while we pay off our IVF debt.
  • More tests: Abdominal ultrasound, Karyotype testing for partner and me
  • So much waiting
  • FET #1: 2 transferred. FIRST POSITIVE EVER!!! The nurse warns me that it my beta is very low and unlikely to be viable.
  • FET ends in a chemical pregnancy a week later.
  • I go back on my anxiety medication, but plan to go off of it again for the next transfer.


  • IVF # 3: Fresh Cycle only = 1 embryo
  • PGS (pre-implantation genetic screening) of the 1 fresh + 2 banked embryos reveals that all three are genetically normal.
  • Back to the drawing board: we switch to a new clinic
  • My new RE thinks I have endometriosis and that it is the cause of our infertility. (Someone took my pain seriously, and we might have answers? What!!)
  • Lots of tests: More comprehensive genetic panel for partner and self, genetic counseling, uterine biopsies, hysteroscopy, abdominal MRI “with gel” (NOT recommended)
  • IVF # 4: Fresh Cycle only = 7 embryos, PGS shows 6 are genetically normal
  • Start birth control pill to prep for surgery
  • Depressive episode, add a new medication to my current anxiety med, diagnosed with Premenstrual Dysphoria Disorder (PMDD) (Just add it to the list).
  • Laproscopic Surgery: confirmed and removed endometriosis, found and removed small uterine septum, third procedure to relieve painful bladder syndrome.
  • 4 weeks of estrogen and 1 week of progesterone to support recovery from surgery

Current & Upcoming (It’s still 2017? Whew!)

  • Current:
    • daily luprolide acetate injections to suppress endometriosis growth (it also puts me into a menopausal state)
    • Taking two daily medications, plus one as needed (to help with anxiety and depression while they’re messing about with my hormones)
  • Upcoming:
    • Switch to monthly lupron injection
    • Just one more test….: 3D ultrasound
    • FET #2 is coming (November?)

Beginning with the Middle

Hello Reader,

Welcome to somewhere in the middle of our infertility journey. I am writing this as I recover from laparoscopic surgery. Infertility blogs have been a huge help to me so far, but lately I’ve been feeling isolated as I search for others in my position. All of our journeys are different, but I hope that putting mine out there helps some of you.

After four failed transfers with “unknown cause” infertility, we’ve finally found a possible cause through a long process of elimination. The surgery was to both diagnose and treat endometriosis. I will now do a not yet fully researched medication protocol leading up to another transfer. Through this whole process I’ve searched online for insights about what each step will be like, because as the title of my blog states: I am impatient. In this blog, I will walk you through what each step of my process is like. I’ll start in the next post with the surgery and go from there. I hope that this helps those of you out there who are also impatiently struggling toward parenthood.